You are a Bette — “I must be strong”
Bettes are direct, self-reliant, self-confident, and protective.
How to Get Along with Me
- Stand up for yourself… and me.
- Be confident, strong, and direct.
- Don’t gossip about me or betray my trust.
- Be vulnerable and share your feelings. See and acknowledge my tender, vulnerable side.
- Give me space to be alone.
- Acknowledge the contributions I make, but don’t flatter me.
- I often speak in an assertive way. Don’t automatically assume it’s a personal attack.
- When I scream, curse, and stomp around, try to remember that’s just the way I am.
What I Like About Being a Bette
- being independent and self-reliant
- being able to take charge and meet challenges head on
- being courageous, straightforward, and honest
- getting all the enjoyment I can out of life
- supporting, empowering, and protecting those close to me
- upholding just causes
What’s Hard About Being a Bette
- overwhelming people with my bluntness; scaring them away when I don’t intend to
- being restless and impatient with others’ incompetence
- sticking my neck out for people and receiving no appreciation for it
- never forgetting injuries or injustices
- putting too much pressure on myself
- getting high blood pressure when people don’t obey the rules or when things don’t go right
Bettes as Children Often
- are independent; have an inner strength and a fighting spirit
- are sometimes loners
- seize control so they won’t be controlled
- figure out others’ weaknesses
- attack verbally or physically when provoked
- take charge in the family because they perceive themselves as the strongest, or grow up in difficult or abusive surroundings
Bettes as Parents
- are often loyal, caring, involved, and devoted
- are sometimes overprotective
- can be demanding, controlling, and rigid
Perhaps this fits me now, but I wasn’t always a “Bette”. Rather, my divorce from The Marine and a string of bad relationships helped me develop into who I am today. When I was younger, I was very much a push-over and a mouse. I didn’t learn how to stand up for myself, or even know it was ok to do so until I’d lived in Alaska for a couple years. I am fully and unequivocally unapologetic for who I am today.
Try this quiz yourself here. What were your results?