Struggling

If I have been quiet recently, forgive me.  It’s been a tough time with my typical anti-holidays sentiments, my family visiting from out of state, work around here trying to get all set up for ponies home, etc, etc, etc.

However, I’m struggling most with knowing I’ll be saying goodbye to a dear, dear friend of mine sooner rather than later.  She has been diagnosed with a terminal illness.  At best, I will be saying goodbye for the last time about five years from now.  At worst, it could be tomorrow.  She will leave behind two severely special needs children, who she will never see grow up to become adults, and who will always, always need their mama.

My heart is breaking for her children, for her family, for myself, but mostly for her, as God has tested her more than Jobe her whole life.

Life is never fair.  But sometimes, life really deals a rough hand to wonderful people.

 

*There’s a point at which I don’t know what to say to my beautiful friend.  I mourn the loss of my friend, am in shock at the impending loss, but yet she is not gone.  I want to mourn for ME, for MY LOSS, but yet she is here still and faces Death with such a positive attitude and outlook.  No self-pity, no fear…  Just a beautiful, serene, loving outlook on life and an ability to treasure every moment, every breath she has left.  I cry for the shadow looming over her life, yet here she is, celebrating what she has, and what she has been given.  She is one of the bravest and strongest women I know, an inspiration and example to so many people for how to live.  Yet, I wallow in my own selfishness and cry for my impending loss…

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And…

Good things just keep on happening!

Remember how a couple weeks ago Sugar wouldn’t load for me?  Or, if you don’t, the short story is Molly and Casey are away on pasture at a friend’s place because my neighbor had a fit that we have horses, even though I’ve lived here 18 months.  This of course prompted the house search and led to us buying the house we’re moving to Thanksgiving weekend.

So, anyways, Ms. Sugar Britches wouldn’t load.  She had A FIT.  She broke a halter, hit her head and created drama all around.  Well, she doesn’t have a single issue loading into a stock trailer.  Said stock trailer is parked in the pasture and she eats in there just fine, even going so far as to stomp her feet at me and look expectantly, as though she’s ready to go.

My landlord will bring her out to our new place for us.  However, he had a price.  But, so did everyone else I talked to about moving Sug.  The price was that we’d buy his TB mare for $500 and he’d move Sugar for free.  Bad Pants accepted the deal immediately.  Know what?  Moving Sugar was going to cost us $400 anyways.  So, BP just bought me ANOTHER MARE for $100.

Wanna know who she is?  Look here.  She actually has 6 decent wins to her name.  Not sure why they didn’t campaign her harder as she did beat out a couple Derby winners for the years she raced.  Well, it doesn’t matter much anyways.  We’re quite happy with her.

I don’t have any pics with moving upon us.  She was being retrained Western at the time.  Since this video was taken a few years ago, Flirt (her barn name) has been used as a trail horse, a company horse, a husband horse, and a kids horse.  She also jumps and has been shown huntseat.

I can barely say it.  I own FIVE horses now.  FIVE.  And 4 of them are mares (and a filly)!  From a self-professed gelding person, I certainly gained a lot of mares in a big hurry!

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Announcement

While some of you, my friends, are participating in NaNoMo this month, I will be much too busy to join you.  Why is that?  Well, let me give you a hint:

5 bed, 3 bath, 4000sf

12 acres total, about 5 newly cleared

and when I’m all done moving into all that, you will be able to find me here, with a glass of wine:

We move in the weekend before Thanksgiving.  I’ve got a lot to pack!

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Attack of the Pirates!

The pirates got my husband!

Last night, because temps were dropping fast, Bad Pants went out to blanket the horses with me in the dark.  He took Molly and left Casey for me to deal with.  (Casey can be a pill when it comes to blanketing).

First, those tricky pirates slicked up a spot in the middle of the pasture, near where I would usually walk to feed Molly.  (The hot wire runs across this spot to form their winter paddock).  Casey was acting a wee bit spooky and I should have known something was up.

So, Bad Pants slid around a bit, but then regained his footing.  Next, he began to crawl through the strands of hot wire.  Beings as it was dark, BP did not detect the trip wire those sneaky pirates had set up on the other side.  He rolled his ankle and went down, blinding Molly with the headlamp in the process.  So in turn, she stepped right on his ankle, then backed up and bumped his other shin trying to disentangle herself.

When Bad Pants went down, he let out a yell.  I dropped Casey’s blanket in a puddle.  (Fat lot of good a soaking wet blanket does!)  Casey took off at a trot, blowing and snorting.  There was no slogging through the muck to blanket him, especially not with a wet blanket!

Luckily, the area where the trip wire was hidden was dry.  Molly’s blanket survived it’s minimal time of the ground and we got her all snugged up for the night.

I helped Bad Pants limp back to the house, left him at the bottom of the stairs, and took the sopping blanket inside.  Before I could come out and assist BP in the house, he scooped up Mo and hobbled up the stairs.  After all, he didn’t want the cat getting frost bite!

I took Mo from BP, got BP inside and parked him on the couch with a bucket for *just in case*.  Then I slid his shoe off, iced his ankle and covered him with blankets since he was a little pale.

Luckily, nothing is broken.  His ankle was probably saved by the soft mud and bed of pine needles that make up our paddock.  I suspect he’ll be right as rain within a week.

Those pirates!  They meant to get me!  My husband foiled their plot and took the hit for me instead.  I hope they won’t be back for more!

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Mr Handy

A few weeks ago, Bad Pants made a simple change in the kitchen that has made our lives A LOT easier.

Our kitchen really hasn’t been updated since 1940.  And since this is a rental, things sometimes are in roughish shape.

In this instance, our pantry was missing a shelf.  Or should have had a shelf.  Or something like that.  You can see the shelf BP put in for me below:

Nice handiwork, huh?  Now, imagine instead of a shelf, there was just a gaping hole and the bottom was filled with clutter.  Yeah, I was trying to be organized and cook with that mess.

Now there is a shelf!  And cannisters to hold ingredients!  So much tidier and easier to find everything!

My husband, he’s a handy guy to have around!  Thanks Honey!

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The End Of An Era

As I write this, in just a few moments, Bad Pants’ former pug, Winston, will be crossing the Rainbow Bridge.  Winston has lived with Disney Princess since their divorce and we have pug-sat off and on since our marriage.

Winston is the last of the truly old dogs in my circle.  He has meant as much to DP as Freya has to me, giving her the same strength, comfort and security that only one’s heart dog can.

Winston has spent the last couple years blind, deaf and without his sense of smell.  No matter how often I’ve railed at Disney Princess’s choice to continue his life, trapped in his own doggie world, my heart goes out to her today.

Winston has been with “Grandma” and Doodle while Disney Princess says goodbye and sees her Army Guy off to War.  DP will not be there to hold him one last time or say goodbye as the light dims in his clouded eyes.  In return, Winston will not be there to greet her after her long, cross country drive back to Oregon next week.  Nor will he be there to greet Doodle again after a long day at school.

This is the end of an era.  All the truly great, truly old dogs of my circle end today with Winston.  It has been a heart wrenching year.

So, if you could, if you would, please say a prayer, light a candle, or send positive thoughts for Winston, Bad Pants, Doodle and Disney Princess today.

Go in Peace, little pug.  Go with love.  You’re job is over.  It’s been a job well done.

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Honey, Where Are The Rolls?

Today, I made dinner rolls from scratch.  Yummy, scrumptious, perfectly poofy and sweet rolls.  They were supposed to be part of our dinner and my main inspiration for making dinner.

Bad Pants pulled them out of the oven when he noticed that the timer on the stove said “End” and I clearly hadn’t heard it go off.  Lucky, I suppose, as he’s saved them from burning.

We each tried one, hot from the oven.  They were…  heavenly!  The best I’d ever made!  So, BP put them to cool on the counter, covered with a clean dish cloth.  He went back to his office to finish up some work and I, I went out to feed the horses and check Casey over since he seemed a wee bit lame.

Bad Pants came out to help me after about 15 minutes.  We spent another 10-15 minutes with the horses and came back in.  He asked, “Honey, where are the rolls?”

“On the counter where you left them.  Why?”

“Um, they’re not there now”.

Instantly I KNEW.  My good dog, this sweet face:

This wonderful dog who helps me day to day, this dog who got upset with her daddy when I was sobbing yesterday (over Freya- she blamed him for my upset), this same dog who put herself between him and I, crawling into my lap and warning him away from me.   This same dog who HAS NEVER counter-surfed ever before,

STOLE THEM!

Yes!  This dog, the one Aunt Krissy called a “marshmallow”.  The dog who cuddles with me every morning after Bad Pants gets out of bed.  The dog who has taken care of me when I’m an emotional wreck and who tells me when somebody is at the door, or when a “friend” shows up hopped up on something.

Roxie Lynn ate my dinner!  She almost became a new pair of shoes.

Could you stay mad at that face?  Me neither!

From now on, I’ll push the rolls back away from the edge of the counter.

No more rolls for you, Roxie Lynn!

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First Day of School

Today was Dude’s first day of school.  We were just officially accepted into the online charter program last Friday, so we didn’t have much time to prepare.  Our materials aren’t due to arrive until sometime Wednesday, but we got started online today anyways.

We’re officially 4 weeks behind everyone else.  Yes, it took 6 weeks for the school to finally get around to accepting us.  That’s 6 weeks of phone calls, filling out forms and more forms, gathering every shred of evidence as to who I am and who he is short of DNA samples.  If they had required DNA proof, it might have just saved time and money for everyone involved.  (Ye Gods Georgia has difficult proof of identity requirements!)

I am exhausted from trying to keep Dude on task and to learn the system and different pages we need to access every day.  There was so much information I had to cram into my head today.  Four hours of online videos and three hours of reading later, and I feel like I’ve put in a full day’s worth of work, something I haven’t done in a couple years now.  Well, outside of farm life.  Yikes!

At least I’ve gotten caught up now and tomorrow should be an easier day.  Dude likes his school so far.  We’ll see how he feels once the materials get here.

Oh, and Dude signed up for 4-H today too.

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Happy Birthday, Dude!

I can hardly believe you are 9 years old today!

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Hearing Impaired, part 3

Please forgive the delay.  We’ve had some excitement of the undesirable kind around here.  It seems that Grandma (my ex-MIL) did NOT want to put Kitty on the plane to me and Kitty missed her flight.  I’ve been recovering from my 3 am drama for a few days.  The story ended well as Kitty is here, albeit more than 12 hours later than scheduled, which was already 2 days later than planned.

Now, where were we?  Oh!  For those of you new or behind here, you can find parts 1 and 2 here and here, respectively.

We left off discussing how Bad Pants travels a ton, how I don’t sleep well without Freya and well, I don’t like being home alone (even with kids present) after dark since I can’t hear what’s going on outside.  Also, I was having a hard time hearing anyone knocking on the door if there was any noise in the house at all.

Enter Roxanne, a 3 1/2 yr old Mastiff-Great Dane cross (the designer name is Mastidane or Daniff- they’re quite common in South Africa).  She’s black with flecks of gray on her face and feet, a white half-heart and outline of the other heart half on her chest and a few white spots on the same gray flecked feet.  She’s got calluses on her hocks and elbows from where a chain rubbed against her body for so long, pins in a hip from where she was put back together at some point after being hit by a car, and hind legs that don’t work as well as they used to.  Like many in this country, her people fell on hard times economically and needed to find her a home.  And so she came to live with us, this giant girl with the sweet, sweet soul, and perfect house manners.

Roxanne will bark if someone knocks at the door.  Roxie also lets out a low growl at strangers until I tell her it’s ok.  She walks nicely on a leash, loves her blankie and is effusive with her kisses.  BP likes that she’s big enough that no one will break in or mess with us when he’s traveling, or any other time.

Now, if I can only get her to alert me to when my phone is ringing.  Can’t have her bring it to me as it’s likely to disappear in her giant maw.  Or be so slobbery as to short out my phone all together.  🙂

Roxanne isn’t a replacement for Freya.  She doesn’t fill that hole in my heart.  She’s just herself, treasured and appreciated for what she brings to our lives.  And we love her already.

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